Sunday, March 08, 2009

Of shoes and ships and sealing wax...

It's strange to feel old at 21. But I suppose college does that to you. Last night, after yet another 2am walk up the length of the campus, I got to thinking about how familiar things seem now, after nearly four years in IIT. I'm unused to such familiarity, it throws me off. I'm far more used to packing up and leaving, confident that I'm leaving whatever messes I've made behind and am proceeding to a new place and yet another fresh start, with brand new messes waiting to be made. It is far harder, I realise now, to stay put and work things out. I'm not very good at it.

Last night's walk had almost a sense of deja vu. The night air felt as cool as it always has, in my countless such walks in the past four years. There were the usual puttering autos that slowed down hopefully when they spotted me. The customary bunch of drunk students singing loudly as they walked back to their hostel. Flexes fluttering in the wind, advertising events from musical nights to quizzing competitions. The scraping of plastic chairs outside the Coffee Day Express as a final bunch of students scrambled to get their caffeine fixes before closing time. The lamp post casting a yellow glare on a bunch of tired freshies with a ladder, putting up yet another flex. The familiar canoodling couples outside my hostel gate. And of course, the watchman fast asleep, with his feet up on the table.

There is comfort in this familiarity. I have closer friends than I've ever had before. Perhaps as A remarked last night, if we weren't living together in the same hostel, sharing the same mess and foozeball table, we wouldn't be friends. But seeing as we are, we accept each other, faults and whimsies. I wonder if I'll ever find such complete acceptance elsewhere.

I thought such sameness would tire me or grate on my nerves. But instead, I find myself clutching at moments, intent upon making them memories before they slip away. This next year is to be just that- a time for rest and contemplation, for dreams and ambition and most of all, a time to remember. Before I'm once again flung into the world outside.

7 comments:

laxs said...

It is very emotional. The best about life is its adaptability to changes. If life is a set of routine, it will be monotony. Sometimes, to chew the past is fine, but do not get senti. As such with the crushing population swell, we are stagnated in this precious earth. Move on... carry the best moments, of course1

gurveen said...

I am gonna miss the familiarity so damn much:(
and i guess u'll miss us as much...
love ya:*

Ravali said...

it def wudnt b the same outside iit
but guess we'll learn to live with tht too jus like we learnt to live here iit when we had to start off here which was new to most of us who were goin to stay away frm home for the first time

things change....places change....ppl change.... so memories r wht we will b holding on to :)

विकास कुमार said...

hmmm

Anonymous said...

I still remember talking to you when you came to my house for advice on what stuff to pack to IIT , when you first went there , and you couldnt understand why I kept saying I loved campus that much:) Well I understand how you feel.
When I left campus I felt miserable too and I would keep myself to my computer and played my old playlist, which was the only thing I had left from my IIT life :)
Well you get over it, pretty soon...
Subhashree

विकास कुमार said...

@Subhashree

get over it? Is it really a good thing?

Vibhav said...

reading this post gave me a sense of deja vu... the way you concluded it sounded like JD in scrubs :P

you have frickin coffee day that stays open till frickin 2am??? now im pissed >.<